Sunday, May 30

heheh.

Stolen from some anonymous coward:

In other news... dah-dah-deet-dah-deet-dah-dah-dahh...

Dateline: Boston. John Kerry announces he's Irish. No, he means he's Jewish. No, he's...

dah-dah-deet-dah-deet-dah-dah-dahh...

Dateline: Washington. John Kerry announces he served in Viet Nam. Nine medals in four months in-theater. That's a world's record!

dah-dah-deet-dah-deet-dah-dah-dahh...

Dateline: The Campaign Trail. John Kerry says that "back in the day" there was no distinction between ribbons and medals and that they were ALL called "medals". So he really did throw his medals over the fence at the peace riot on the Washington Mall in 1971. Er, well, he really did throw somebody ELSE's "medals" over the fence at the Washington peace riot in 1971.

dah-dah-deet-dah-deet-dah-dah-dahh...

Dateline: Washington. John Kerry announces at an Earth Day celebration that he does not own an SUV. Er, well, those three or four SUVs sitting in the multicar garages at his various estates belong to the FAMILY, not HIM! So get your facts straight you trained Washington Press Corps monkeys.

dah-dah-deet-dah-deet-dah-dah-dahh...

Dateline: Los Angeles. John Kerry announces on a Dick Cavett Show appearance in 1971, one among many such occasions, that pretty much the entire US military in Viet Nam are war criminals for, among other things, participating in free-fire zones. In 2004, John Kerry says that the reprehensible actions of a few prison guards at Abu Ghraib should not take anything away from the support of the American people for the "ninety-nine point nine nine nine nine percent" of the US military who are serving honorably and well in Iraq.

dah-dah-deet-dah-deet-dah-dah-dahh...

Dateline: Idaho. John Kerry announces, "off the record", that he did NOT fall down snowboarding on the slopes near his palatial winter lodge in Idaho. Instead "that sone-of-a-bitch" secret service body guard "knocked me down".

dah-dah-deet-dah-deet-dah-dah-dahh...

Dateline: Managua. John Kerry illegally (and treasonably) travels to Nicaragua, along with several other Democrat congressmen and senators, to see Commandante Daniel Ortega when the Sandinista communists were in power in the 1980s. His "mission of conscience" was directly aiding and abetting the communists drive to suppress all dissent in Nicaragua, indirectly aiding the communist government in Cuba, and the expansionist aims of the Soviet Union (deceased 1991).

dah-dah-deet-dah-deet-dah-dah-dahh...

Dateline: On the Campaign Trail. John Kerry says "off the record", over a mike he though was switched off, that Republicans are the most "dishonest, arrogant bastards" that he has ever seen.

dah-dah-deet-dah-deet-dah-dah-dahh...

Dateline: USA. John Kerry is asking for your vote in the upcoming 2004 election.

That'll give the bush bashers something to think about before they open their mouths.

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